the other side of the fence

Whenever the daily grind of being a parents gets to be a bit much several of my friends and I have a running joke about how we want a large, unattractive nanny. We all secretly believe that those who have nannies have it easier. The trick to that is that all the people who I know that have nannies also have jobs. I have a friend who is a specialist physician and I admit that I have looked at her life and been jealous at times. She has a fabulous nanny (who is neither large nor unattractive), a prestigious job and beautiful children. She is incredibly intelligent and well-spoken, she is unfailingly polite and seemingly unflappable. She is kind and funny. She called me the other morning following a playgroup that had gone particularly well to tell me about how after we all left her lovely home her toddler urinated in several inappropriate places and she slipped in cat vomit on her way to stop him. This I can relate to. This I am not intimidated by. Her kids get sick and stay up all night and say naughty words and she never gets to sleep in either. I have decided that it doesn't matter whether we stay home or work- Parenting is really hard sometimes. Sometimes it's wonderful. We just have different complications. There are lots of ways to do it right and there are lots of ways to do it wrong. We all have a little of both every day. And we have each other. The best resource and support I have is my friends, so, thanks everyone. I couldn't do it without you.

multi-tasking

When your three -year-old offers to help you carry the groceries into the house do not hand him a carton of blueberries. He will try to eat them while he is walking and this will happen...
He will feel very embarrassed and help you clean up. His version of cleaning up will consist of eating blueberries and watching you pick up the rest. He will then offer to carry the eggs.

personal space

Yesterday when I went to church, I looked great. I love dressing up for church (or anything else). I love dresses and skirts and heels. I love how I feel in them and I used to love how I looked in them. I haven't felt like I looked really good in a long time. 18 months to be exact (9 months of prenancy+9 months post pregnancy). I finally felt like myself. People ask me what it is about pregnancy that makes me despise it so, it's not feeling like me. It's almost like being out of your own body, you don't look or feel like yourself and this other little person has a very legitimate claim on your personal space. Please don't get me wrong, I am so grateful to be able to get pregnant and have healthy and relatively uneventful pregnancies and deliveries. I just miss being selfish about my space. I miss exercising until I'm sick just because I want to, I miss eating or not eating without thinking about how it affects a little one and I miss feeling good about how I look in a great pencil skirt or skinny jeans. I miss wearing stilettos for no good reason. I have not yet quite reached my goal but I am close enough that I am starting to feel like a person again. A person who is a mom, but maybe, if she didn't have her kids with her, you wouldn't know for sure.

free and easy

On Saturday the kids and I dropped Dad off at work and went out to run some errands while he was busy. The third store we went to was Hobby Lobby. While we were there Tommy informed me that he needed to use the restroom. I took him in and waited patiently. He opened the door and asked me to help him pull up his pants. As I did so I noticed his underpants were missing. He was wearing only shorts and nothing else. To the amusement of the other ladies in the restroom I asked him what had become of the missing underpants. He calmly informed me that he had removed them and put them in his drawer because he didn't need them anymore. Of course.

shoeshine

No one needs gold shoes. Though I have to say that today I went to a yoga class and I bought these (on sale at Von Maur) , and I can't really say which made my guts feel happier but I think that the tie goes to the shoes. I feel sort of guilty that few things make my heart as happy as a beautifully made piece of footwear. I have nothing to wear with these shoes, whole outfits will be built around them. Every time I see them I grin a little. I took the box out of my closet three times after I put them away just to look at them. Sigh. Certainly not needed, but oh so wanted.

tweaking

I know- I have messed with the blog again. I promise I am finished with major changes for a while at least. I had a really hard time finding a backgound and layout that I love, but now I am satisfied and do not intend to change anything major anytime soon. Thank you for your patience.

Happy Fathers' Day!

The greatest aspiration I can think of for my boys is to be like their father.

karma

My little boys had popcorn and caramel Junior Mints for dinner. By the time we put them in the bathtub they smelled of chocolate, butter, sand, grass and sunscreen. We started the day at Tommy's new gymnastics class. It was perfect. Patient, kind teachers and a kid who is starting to find a lot of joy in doing a somersault on request. We went from the Y to the best sprinkler park in town. It has fountains, sprayers and water guns, not to mention a pretty great play structure. It was also the place where some of his favorite friends happened to be. Tommy, Nathan, and Owen ran around in their swimsuits, followed after by the babies. We came home to fill the plastic pool in the backyard and take the cover off the sandbox. While Johnny napped, Tommy and I pulled my favorite kitchen rocking chair out onto the deck and put on our swimsuits. We rocked and snuggled and ate popsicles in the sunshine. We made friends with an ant. We took pictures of ourselves. We tried to take pictures of our friend the ant (they didn't quite work out). Mommy read her book and Tommy drove his trucks in the sand. Daddy came home early and the four of us went to see the panda movie. We bought fancy movie popcorn and candy and soda. Tommy watched barefoot (he always takes his shoes off to watch movies, apparently, even at the theater) and laughed at all the wrong places and Johnny clapped and begged for soda (which he did not receive, he is too little). Tommy played panda with Daddy until bedtime and snuggled his wet hair into my neck while I read his bedtime stories. It was a lovely day. Ty says it's the universe's way of paying me back for Wednesday. Maybe, but I definitely got the better end of the bargain.

key to my heart

Yesterday I lost my keys. Until the birth of my second child I had never lost a set of keys in my life. Since John was born it has happened three times. All three times I eventually found them in some random place (i.e. the writing drawer, in the mailbox lock,in the front door) This time they were nowhere. I had both kids in the car ready to take Tommy to school when I discovered they were missing. My poor boys waited patiently in the car for 30 mintues while I frantically searched. At that point I brought them in the house. I spent the rest of the day looking. I went through every drawer, closet and toy bin in my house. We couldn't go anywhere. Tommy missed school and we didn't go to the pool as planned in the afternoon. I kept waiting for him to throw a fit about all that he was missing. He didn't He just watched movies and played with his trains and clamly reassured me,"Don't worry, Mommy, you'll find your keys." all day long. Johnny sweetly followed me around all day cooing and snuggling whenever I picked him up, loving me desperately even though I was an idiot. I looked all day. I also managed to shatter a fluorescent light tube all over the carpet in Tommy's room and got to spend an hour picking up tiny shards of glass before I could vacuum the rest. I called the Honda dealership and was told that they could make me a key with my title and ID. Feeling very relieved I got a sitter and took Ty's truck (luckily he had ridden his bike to work) and headed over. When I got there they told me that the key they could make would only unlock the doors, not drive the car. Not helpful. If I wanted one that would drive the car I had to have it towed over there and it was going to cost a lot more money. Super. I went home and continued looking. When Ty got home we both looked until bedtime. At that point we had decided that I would have to give up and have it towed. I got up and ran early and then I called AAA and I called the same friend as yesterday to come watch the kids, again. (Bless you, Amber) They said the tow truck would be here in an hour. While we were waiting my dear friend Katrina called and comiserated, telling me of a time when she had lost her keys for several hours and they had been on the roof of her car. Just then the truck arrived. We answered the door and Tommy told the nice driver all about how we had lost our keys and Mommy had to go to the key store to get new ones. I went to open the garage to let him in and there, sitting on top of the car are my *$^#&@ keys. I shamefacedly informed him that we would no longer require his services as the lost keys had been discovered. My little boy was thrilled. It is lovely that my little boys love me no matter what happens. Even when I am the least intelligent person they know.

shiner

Johnny has reached an important milestone. He has his first black eye. He was pulling up on a chair and missed his hand grip. He hit his cheek bone and forehead on the chair leg. Luckily I was already running into the pediatrician for a suspected ear infection so we just had him look at it while were there (affirmative for double ear infections, too). His brother spent about 9 months with an almost constant shiner. There is a distinct hole in our photos from that era because I kept thinking that each one was the last one. Not this time. The bruises don't show very well in the photos yet, but I'll keep taking them either way.

spoiled rotten

This evening the transformer in our neighborhood was struck by lightning and the power went out. It was only out for about 45 minutes. This is, of course no big deal right? It was right after dinner. The sky was dark with the storm so we couldn't see, we couldn't run the dishwasher, no phones, no internet, no washing machine, no dryer, no music, no bedtime stories without lights, no air conditioning in 70% humidity. Tommy loved it. He had to call Grandma on the cell phone to tell her that the sump pump was beeping incessently to warn us that it was running on battery power. I remember power outages when I was a kid, they were fun. Candles and ice cream, nothing important to do. Ty remembers a three-day power outage in St. George in July (gasp!) he and his brothers have fond memories, his mother must have been tearing her hair out. I really didn't like not being able to get my stuff done when I was ready to get it done. I realized I am a spoiled, rich westerner who has no idea the kind of conditions in which many people in this world live but I was oh so happy when the lights came on and I could start the dishwasher and read the bedtime stories by lamplight. Thank you Mr. Edison..

vacation photos

ruby slippers

Yesterday morning I slipped on my favorite red, satin ballet flats and packed our bags. We have been visiting family in Utah for the last ten days. It was an absolute whirlwind. We had two graduations, two baby blessings, a family reunion and several other activities. By the end of the week poor Tommy was almost manic because he was so tired. It was wonderful to see my children with all seven of their grandparents, all of their cousins and many of their aunts and uncles. We saw Thomas the Train and rode the train and went to the train museum. Johnny said "Mama" for the first time. I ran a race and bonded with my siblings and old friends anew. I found that I really miss my sisters and my brother, but not as much as I missed home. Home is an elusive concept for us but I am finding that it is where my stuff is, where my friends are,where my husband is, where my life is. So I put on my red shoes, rounded up my babies and boarded a plane. And found that I agree wholeheartedly with Dorothy, there's no place like home.