Thursday, June 17, 2010

a small wallow


I am a social creature.  I adore my friends and tend to have lots. This is not due to anything on my part but the fact that I want to be around people most of the time so I foster any relationship that interests me in the slightest. But I have started to notice something about my friends. They are all superstars.They are all extra great at what ever it is that they focus their energy upon. They are not middle of the road people. Not one of them. They are volunteers, artists, supermoms, professionals, doctors. They know their schedule by heart, they know my schedule by heart. They create amazing works of art in their spare time. They work out hard six days a week. they cook healthy, home made dinners every night. Their houses are clean, they are effortless hostesses. They spend hours volunteering in the their kids' schools and the wider community. They are mostly skinnier and prettier than me. They do the same things i do, but better. They run faster, write more eloquently and control their tempers completely.They are reading this and scoffing out loud because they don't see it in themselves but they are, quite literally, amazing. Most of the time I revel in being surrounded by these super inspirational people and I love them but this week I feel like the 14 year-old who somehow got invited to the party at the cheerleaders house and just knows it's a mistake. And I am waiting for them to notice that I am not so very awesome but much closer to average.  And that lately, I just can't keep up. And that I compensate by talking to much and laughing to loudly. Is it weird to feel intimidated by people you love, by people who, by all accounts, love you? 'Cause today, I kind of am.

9 comments:

Emz said...

man, I adore you.

I swear you wrote this for me. I have these "intimidated by people you love" days WAY TOO OFTEN.

But you know what, these same people are comparing themselves to YOU at this very moment. I'd put money on it. Heck, I want to be like you and I've never even MET you.

You are amazing.

Carrie said...

You focus way too much on the things "you think" you can't do and need to relish in the things you are AMAZING at! I agree, that everyone is really good at something (remember my son claiming everyone has a Special Talent), but that includes you! Not one of us is good at everything and that's what makes us human and lovable. We compliment each other, we are all pieces of this big "Friendship Puzzle". Without you, it isn't complete.

Julie said...

Sigh.

The Busby Family said...

who in the world are you hanging out with? You should spend some time with me and you would feel much better about yourself!

Steph and Andrew said...

Interesting, that's how I feel about you! You are truely amazing and don't forget it. I miss and love you very much.

Adri said...

I completely feel the same. Maybe we're just so smart we just pick the REALLY great people to be friends with! :)

Like you, Miss Angie...

Andrea said...

Haha...I'm with you Lisa!! Angie, you should hang out with me and Lisa. Underachievers rule. :)

Angie said...

This was in reference to every single one of you:)

Linn said...

I'm totally coming in last here because of vacation, but seriously, love this post, because I SO relate. I don't mind being an underachiever. It makes life easier (or lazier, either one). I adore you friend!